I thought about releasing this recipe to the fediverse but it is too delicious. It will threaten the safety of everyone who tastes it. Even the smell is too dangerous
People are accusing me in the replies of this being advertisement for my upcoming cookbook. This is lies and slander. I am merely worrying about everyone's gastrointestinal safety. I have already given tastes to private testers. They agree it is too delicious
@cadey I can try but we are going to have to gatekeep it behind the new Anubis Gastronomy Edition
@adriano only all-vegan blood is used in the recipe, I assure you
...but are you promoting it enough, is the real question? When you look back on this moment in history, will you be wondering if there was something more you could have done? Will you be able to look your great-great-grandkids in the eye with a clear conscience, knowing that you gave your utmost to properly shape their cuisine with all the love and care that they deserve???
@cwebber the five close friends you made this for approve your message
@cwebber danger-woman signing up for recipe duty πππ€£
@cwebber was it found to be delicious once in the 500 times it was tried?
@cwebber Fine, keep it! I'll be really pissed if you'll ever release it.
In all seriousness since I am actually a FOSSgirl who loves sharing, I will share with you the recipe I made for dinner. I said it contains vegan blood in one of the replies here and it does! π§΅
This is a VERY simple meal, and surprisingly easy to make for just one person.
First your ingredients:
- A bulb of fennel. It doesn't need the fronds but we will use them if you have them
- Yogurt. It can be vegan yogurt, there are many good ones on the market
- Pick up one of those weird "vegetarian burgers" in the vegan section where you're like, is that really a burger? I picked up "sweet potato and black bean", but get whatever: black bean and corn, chickpea and kale, the less like a normal burger the better (we are gonna serve it as its own thing)
- Citrus! Blood orange, or maybe lemon
The other things you should have on hand (some kind of oil, salt, black pepper, literally any green dried herb)
Okay we're gonna make it!
- First, prepare the fennel. Cut the stems off the top, if present. Separate a few of the fronds. We won't be eating the stems but you can slice them lengthwise and scrape the flesh out with your teeth, it will be like celery licorice and is delicious. Slice the tough bottom of the bulb off, and cut in half, then quarter. Slice across "horizontally", it should make lovely little rainbows.
- Now wash your citrus well, since we will be using the outside for the drink. Halve and then quarter your citrus, and remove the flesh; we will be using the rinds separately. Slice the rinds into little strips.
- Find a teacup, put the rinds in there. Pour some sweetener, agave or honey probably, and then pour hot water over it. Stir and let steep. This is your complementary drink! (Alternately you could also do it with some of the fennel!)
(cotd)
- Heat up a skillet, preferably cast iron, and pour some oil in there. I didn't use anything fancy, in fact I used the opposite of fancy; I just used canola oil, and it was perfectly good. But you can use something else!
- Add the fennel rainbows. Sprinkle salt to taste over top. Let them start to sear, and then turn occasionally. They should start to brown nicely. Sprinkle black pepper over top.
- They're getting nice and brown? Translucent, but not mushy? Good. Take your citrus flesh and squeeze it over top! Pick out any seeds that fall in. Now toss the vegetables in the pan for a bit, taste if to your salt levels, and transfer to a plate.
- Now in that same pan, heat up some more oil, and put in the vegan patty! That's right, we're not getting too fancy here, we're letting the creative flavors of the patty do the work. Cook through, transfer to plate. (No bun needed!)
(cotd)
- Let's make the sauce. You can mix this in a separate bowl or cup, but when it's just me I'm lazy and do it right on the plate! Dollop some yogurt with a teaspoon. Add salt to it. Take whatever green herb you've chosen, I chose ground sage! Mix it up with the spoon.
- Now you should have your fennel, patty, yogurt sauce all assembled! But it needs to be a little bit fancier. So take some of those sprigs of fennel fronds and add them to your plate as a (tasty) garnish!
Now go take your beverage and plate of delicious dinner someplace nice, maybe where you can hear the birds singing and the cool breeze on your face. Or just eat it on a table or on your couch! Whatever you feel like!
That's what I made for dinner! I hope you like it!
@cwebber @cargot_robbie truly, you are too wise for us π. Thank you, thank you!
@cwebber awesome thank you! I was looking for a vegan recipe to invite a friend, it looks so perfect! I couldn't find vegan burgers so far in supermarkets but will adapt, it's such a good idea to recycle food which would have needed more consumption of energy and is better with less! And to make an original drink from the recipe and at the same time is awesome too
@joy70 You could also make a black bean burger yourself! They are actually very easy, but I didn't make one tonight, so I didn't include a recipe :)
@cwebber Sounds fun, never tried cooking with fennel!
> Now toss the vegetables
Which vegetables does this refer to?
@cwebber considering adding this to the fennel wiki...
@cwebber Do you include the bread (of the burger) in the cast iron skillet? If not, do you use it the way we traditionally use it? Do you put the sauce on top of the plate once served or do you put the food into a spoon into the sauce dish? (I guess a fork is not very practical in this case). How rich this recipe sounds, perhaps for one meal a day, nice!
@joy70 I didn't eat it with any bread at all! The point was that you can just eat the patty as its own delicious item, no need for a bun :)
The sauce I just dip it in as I go
@technomancy Do it!
@dieweltist the fennel
Since I didn't make it clear, the goal here is that you don't really need to serve these fancy vegan burger things on a bun. You can of course! But the thing that makes them good is that they are packed with flavor, and being on a bun hides that. They're more interesting as their own flavor, so the goal of this recipe is to let them do all the work of the main, highly flavorful protein and put the effort into a delicious side, and the two things together deliver a really wonderful meal.
@cwebber Delightful! Thanks for sharing the steps. I've never used fennel in this way, and I do like it. So I'm going to keep an eye out for fresh bulbs at the store!
@cwebber this sounds really good! I often just have fennel raw or sometimes roast it. Iβm unfortunately the only one in this household who likes fennel though so I might just have to make it for myself sometime.